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| Sticking it to the MAN!! or woMAN!!
 Jokes.. N.B. "We are not out to offend anyone or to be racist, IF THIS IS YOU, DONT READ IT." 'Why I fired my Secretary' Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, 'Happy Birthday!', and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone ' Happy Birthday.' I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids.... They will remember. My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, 'Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday!! It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered. I worked until one o'clock, when Jane knocked on my door and said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me.' I said, 'Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go! We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go. She chose instead at a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Jane said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day... We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do We ?' I responded, 'I guess not. What do you have in mind ? She said, 'Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner.' After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said, ' Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back.' 'Ok.' I nervously replied.. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ... Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing 'Happy Birthday'. And I just sat there... On the couch... Naked. 'What's the best cheese to entice Bear's down from the Mountain. "comeonbear"' 'Polish fans have been officially warned, That is they cause any trouble during Euro 2012 they will be deported back to the UK.' 'My girlfriend said to me the other day "Onions are the only food that can make you cry", so i threw a coconut at her face' 'Whenever i'm on the beach and i get caught short, i dig a deep hole in the sand and have a poo in it. To prove i'm not all bad, i like drop a penny in first. I like to reward people who go around metal detecting' 'After Yesterdays score, looks like Greece will be out of 2 Euros this year' 'New Car Park: With the high rate of attacks on women in secluded car parks, especially during evening hours, the Southampton City Council has established a 'Women Only' car park at the Bitterne Shopping Centre. Even the car park attendants are exclusively female so that a comfortable and safe environment is created for patrons. Below is the first picture available of this world-first women-only car park in the United Kingdom.' 
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